WILLIAM T. SMITH'S GAMES
MY BACKSTORY
Comrades! My name is William T. Smith, born in 1825 deep in the communist paradise, I was forced to learn the USSR's programming language, NARTORF, at the age of 4.
When the Bolsheviks rolled in, I became the USSR's lead punch-card wizard. I spent my time coding the program that evenly distributed food to the people. But in 1965, after I created the first ever "video game", "Tractor Wars" — they got jealous and froze me in a bunker stuffed with a lifetime supply of borscht after trashing the source code.
I hibernated through the fall of the great union, the rise of the interwebs, and all that capitalist nonsense. Then I awoke in November 2025, apparently this "climate-change" thing melted the ice cube i was in...
Two hundred years old and I still code circles around you zoomers. Download or get sent to the GULAG!
 CRAB GUN December 23, 2025 You're a crab with a gun and you shoot pelicans... ...what else can you do not shoot pelicans? 
(3.13MB, ~10 minutes @ 56k / Windows 2000 or later required) |
William T Smith is a ficticious character and any resemblence to a real person is by mistake.